I rememeber when I met Gonczarov at Sirjoznyj Kolhoz. It was during my night shift, ordinary night made extraordinary by a sudden visit.
At 2AM I took a break and went from Sovnarkom hq to the militia-friendly pub Sirjoznyj Kolhoz. I wanted relax a bit and have a game of bar billiards. At this time, the pub was full of militiamen who kept returning from city's actions or preparing to go for the night patrol. I ordered double vodka, took the cue and started to arrange the billiard balls. I noticed someone approaching me. I wanted to play alone so I was prepared to get rid of the wanna-be billiards player.
It was Gonczarov who approached me. He came closer to me and for a while we looked each other face to face. Before he even opened his mouth and spoke to me I noticed something disturbing in his appearnace, a pinch of insanity in his eyes. His lunatic look reminded me of my Czech colleague, Bratislav, who finally finished at the mental asylum. I studied philosophy with Bratislav back to our university days. He prepared his master's thesis about the origins of madness in society. He became so involved in it that eventually they took him in a straitjacket to the mental hospital. Since then I saw him only once. His eyes were absent, he slept almost all the day, most of his time being on strong medicaments. His body was not responsive, he had no longer that struggle to live and was now only an empty shell thrown out on the ocean of sharks. He was lost to his friends, family, closed in his mind, hung in the abyss somewhere among the brain neurons.
Gonczarov had similar look and it wasn't long for me to have realized that I have to take precautions speaking to him.
'Playing billiards?' He started the conversation, as if trying to gather accurate words.
'That's right, no better way to relax for a while.' I answered and hit the green ball into the left corner.
'So, what have you been doing lately?'
'This and that, nothing special...'
'...still working on that murder case, aren't you?'
'Still.' I tried to cut the conversation.
'You are quiet good at developing it. Must have good informants in the city.' Gonczarov smiled and looked at me waiting to get his answer. I hit another ball but said nothing.
'I wonder who helps you. Must be someone really close to you.'
'You know that I cannot tell anyone about my insidemen.' I told it and at the same time regretted telling it to him.
'So, you are not denying that you have someone?' Gonczarov was excited to learn something from me. I revealed something that I shouldn't have. It was like she said once. Involuntarily I can reveal some information just talking carelessly to people who can squeeze some important facts out of me and use them against me. Whatever, I thought, I hit the black ball into the right corner.
'Hey, you hit the black ball as the last one, you still have some on the table. You just hit the wrong ball' Gonczarov all the time was supervising my game.
'No, Gonczarov, I hit the right one.' I replied. I lifted the black ball from the corner in my hand and put it into his hand. 'It is the right one.' I looked at his absent eyes and left Sirjoznyj Kolhoz.
At 2AM I took a break and went from Sovnarkom hq to the militia-friendly pub Sirjoznyj Kolhoz. I wanted relax a bit and have a game of bar billiards. At this time, the pub was full of militiamen who kept returning from city's actions or preparing to go for the night patrol. I ordered double vodka, took the cue and started to arrange the billiard balls. I noticed someone approaching me. I wanted to play alone so I was prepared to get rid of the wanna-be billiards player.
It was Gonczarov who approached me. He came closer to me and for a while we looked each other face to face. Before he even opened his mouth and spoke to me I noticed something disturbing in his appearnace, a pinch of insanity in his eyes. His lunatic look reminded me of my Czech colleague, Bratislav, who finally finished at the mental asylum. I studied philosophy with Bratislav back to our university days. He prepared his master's thesis about the origins of madness in society. He became so involved in it that eventually they took him in a straitjacket to the mental hospital. Since then I saw him only once. His eyes were absent, he slept almost all the day, most of his time being on strong medicaments. His body was not responsive, he had no longer that struggle to live and was now only an empty shell thrown out on the ocean of sharks. He was lost to his friends, family, closed in his mind, hung in the abyss somewhere among the brain neurons.
Gonczarov had similar look and it wasn't long for me to have realized that I have to take precautions speaking to him.
'Playing billiards?' He started the conversation, as if trying to gather accurate words.
'That's right, no better way to relax for a while.' I answered and hit the green ball into the left corner.
'So, what have you been doing lately?'
'This and that, nothing special...'
'...still working on that murder case, aren't you?'
'Still.' I tried to cut the conversation.
'You are quiet good at developing it. Must have good informants in the city.' Gonczarov smiled and looked at me waiting to get his answer. I hit another ball but said nothing.
'I wonder who helps you. Must be someone really close to you.'
'You know that I cannot tell anyone about my insidemen.' I told it and at the same time regretted telling it to him.
'So, you are not denying that you have someone?' Gonczarov was excited to learn something from me. I revealed something that I shouldn't have. It was like she said once. Involuntarily I can reveal some information just talking carelessly to people who can squeeze some important facts out of me and use them against me. Whatever, I thought, I hit the black ball into the right corner.
'Hey, you hit the black ball as the last one, you still have some on the table. You just hit the wrong ball' Gonczarov all the time was supervising my game.
'No, Gonczarov, I hit the right one.' I replied. I lifted the black ball from the corner in my hand and put it into his hand. 'It is the right one.' I looked at his absent eyes and left Sirjoznyj Kolhoz.
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